In My Own Hands (The End of the Rainbow)

This one is a collaboration so I can’t & won’t dare take credit for it alone it’s a team work & it remains so.
I’d like to thank my friend “R” for agreeing to share the burden of sorting out the mess, madness & writing half of it (everything in italic ;)).
It’s a story in the form of a poem that we hope may bestow some logic , reason & hope in our otherwise crazy day to day lives & may be yours 😉
Of Sorrow & trials
My life seems over
Spending every waking moment
Searching for a four leaf clover
More trouble
Than it’s worth
It’s either death
Or birth
Oh aye
No pot o’ gold for you
A quest that has taken my whole
Yet I’m nowhere near
Reaching my goal
You see me as a child
A trickster sinister me
Only a fool plays the wild
Sea of lies… let it be
Into thin air I vanish
Cynical is indeed fate
Always find what we want
A second too late
I journey to the end of the rainbow
Where I find a pot of gold
Face to face with its owner
Who seems like me
A loner
Three wishes
Heavier than gold
Don’t obsess
In time they unfold
What I want
Isn’t sold
A price that is
Heavier than gold
It shines much less
But when you are old
It keeps you warm
Through all the cold
Grant you three wishes
But try to catch me not
Luck is never
Served on dishes,
Following a rainbow,
Or eyeing a pot


Promises made only
Only to be broken
For what are promises ?
But words spoken
Vanish you will
In a blink of an eye
Creature of myth
I come not to play


No one can lead life on their own
None of us deserves to be alone
U knew I’m a loner, it’s true
I grant u the wish, off let me go


A wish you say?
If magic be true
Then so is my pain
For nothing lasts forever
I’ve seen it with my eyes
Even your magic one day will die


Change… Change…

An unbearable life that on one’s own
No one deserves to lead it all alone

U knew I’m a loner, it’s true

I grant you the wish, off let me go

No pot o’ gold can compensate
You met me now and it is your fate


So tell me how to find
The four leaf clover
It grants not three
But four wishes moreover


The obsession is not over
For a damned four leaf clover
If you dare and still do crave
Know it’s only for the brave
Those who can let go
Of pain

And the  past they throw


Let go ?
A past to throw?
Who am I or you?
Without what we’ve been through?


Only faith in love and hope
Can pull the clover on a rope
But those who fret, scream and cry
In their pain they live and die


I’ll take my  chance with the fourth
I’ll bet it all on “luck”
For if I have to lose me to find that damn clover
I’d rather stay me & die as a loner


Hold on to the past
And you see no future
The hurt, pain and grudge
Your present they will smudge
It’s all up to you
To seek or let go


Why Wait?

Running out of breath

Why does it have to be like this?

Holding tight, your hand in mine

Subliminal gestures

I know you’re in pain

The clock’s ticking

I know I’m losing


Each second passing by

Just proves that true


Proof of concept

I’m a fool

Realization is just too cruel

Smack me across my face to wake

I’m sure its all a silly mistake

When you spend your life in denial

Know then  you’re bound to fail

I’ll do it tomorrow everyday

What if tomorrow comes not ?


Why wait?

Second chances you can’t afford

Guaranteed to survive a war?

Been through all this before?

Then why do you seem unsure?


There a hint of wisdom there

And a sparkle of whats care

Mixed with knowledge I swear

Cruelty is just a dare

You can stab me a thousand times

Yet still mask the greater pain

Be it yours or be it mine

No one can tell but surely time

All the cards we had to hide

Appearing mystified

Cheating my way through life?

You know me better than that



Why wait?

There ain’t no shortcuts in life

The whole distance you’ll have to take

Walk through every street

Till you reach that place you seek

Every single gate you pass

What do you see in the glass?


Alone is not a word

No purpose means no hurt

In a thousand years we’ll sort

The madness in this fort

The one we call our minds

Constantly we think divine

Yet its not

Its just a game

May you call me by my name


Why wait? Why wait?

The love of your life

Out there some where

Waiting for you

Don’t you care?

Why wait ?

I’ll wait for you

I’ll wait if true

Till the stars in the sky show me what to do

I’ll wait for you

I’ll wait if  you

Have been waiting for me too

Or Worse

The seriousness of being sane

The Pitt you fall in

Unleash your pain

The promises said & broken

Each word regretting you hadn’t spoken

What if the magic you realize

Only has affect after we try?

The laughter & the tears

Embrace me don’t chase away

The silence of decades

As both of us just trace

The meaning of it all to that day


For better

Or worse

Let life be a curse

Why imagine its all about the fun?

When lying sick in my bed you run?

Wherever , whenever was it not together?

Not so as it seems like a cheesy movie’s theme

Forever & ever don’t lie

I’m too clever

To be sucker punched

I still hold a grudge


Your eyes were the maze

Breathless I was amazed

As you showed me the way

True wonder displayed

In awe I surrendered

To perfect sense rendered

Completely captivated

By the music that makes it

Far better

For better


Or worse

When you give your kids birth

Accept them as they are

God’s gift needs   not be more

Intended so splendid

Unique as it is

You can’t change what you have

Why change total bliss?


The things we criticize

Often shape our lives

The people we care for

Are those we hurt the most

Regret is the ghost

We often hate, we’ve lost

Somethings just can’t be changed

Words spoken cause the pain

Or worse

My curse

Your curse

Engraved on your heart the words

Burning through your chest

You’ve lost

Whats worth

More than your whole life

Tears falling

To God you’re praying

May I be gone today

Forgiven, trade whats left

Just for a last word

Marching to the Gallows

May it be the best of days

Of your life

May I say just one last thing

You hear as nice

May it all just make us feel

A bit more wise

As precious as the moments

Left in our lives


Silence seems

The only answer

That you seek

Words I speak

Dare not

Cross my lips

They creep

In chains

In pain

All I utter is your name


May it be the worst of days

Of my life

May I show you one last thing

Don’t close your eyes

May it all just make us feel

A bit more wise

As precious as the moments

Left in our lives


Hopes & Dreams

Yet nothing seems

That way

I swear we had it all

Planned out

Down to the last detail

The magic of what was

Like eternity

Yet the spell

Must’ve been broken

All thats left

Is reality


May it be the final day

Of my life

May I say just one last thing

Before I die

May it all just make you feel

A bit more wise

Whats left are the memories

Of those precious times

Bleed & Blame

In a realm beyond this one

The truth would only mean ruin

Unmask everyone

Unleash the terror of whats them

The boy lying on the floor

Chained screaming out “No More”

After a billion years of war

Locked for eternity

What for?

The crime is being true

Rub the lamp “speak the truth”

“This Da-mar serves no fool”

As the Jini emerges silence does rule

“Would you like me to end all this?”

“Dare not defy, just grant my wish”

“Puny human know your place”

” Only the mighty Al-lam may say my name”

“A friend who’d forever be true”

“Betray me not till death come through”

Worse than Death

I live through life

Struck time again

By the same lies

They say that honesty is nice

I say

Bleed & Blame

Each time

There’s no promise they mean to keep

A man of his word is only weak

So lonely in your mind

Desperate to design

A world devoid of pain

A heart, how is it used?

Oh wait, yes it is abused

Oh wait, Is that the truth?

Worse than Death

I live through life

Struck time again

By the same lies

They say that honesty is nice

I say

Bleed & Blame

Each time

This world has gone insane

The right one’s you out of their brain

Trapped in a dungeon

Hopelessly he mentions

How it all began

Cursed to no end

They love to pretend

Get closer to you

Go on play the fool

Worse than Death

I live through life

Struck time again

By the same lies

They say that honesty is nice

I say

Bleed & Blame

Each time

But only you

But only you

Should you blame

Be the Same ?

Drunk on love
May be life
I’m shred to pieces
By that same old knife
It’s a promise
I’ll have to break
I’ve made more
Than one mistake
There’s a door
That’s forever locked
I’ll  find the key
Even if I’m mocked

If you wanna be the same
Live life let go
Just ease the pain

If all u wanna do is blame
You’ll find someone
But it’ll only
Feel the same

We’ve been through
So much
I think
I’ve lost my touch
The one thing we can’t do
Is Trust
Yet to live it seems
A must
The center of it all
Is you
Who am I to say?
I have no clue

If you wanna lose your dream
Hold tight grab on
Let the past in

If you think its all a scheme
Then what the hell
You been doing?

With a mask
Tight on your face
You speak your mind
Without a trace
Where is the truth?
Don’t lose
Your faith

If you wanna be the same
Live life let go
Just ease the pain

If you really wanna change
Live life
Forget the pain

The Impossible

Love Stories
Those heart breaking songs
Fairy Tales have us thinking
“Nothing can ever go wrong”
I wish for all the best
I hope we’re all so blessed

But Say

What if that plan doesn’t turn out ok ?
Betting all your chips on one number
Just sounds to me

Beauty lies in the eye of the beholder
We’re standing still &  getting older
Past mistakes made me, who I am today
Broken to be better
Trying to be less bitter

Tears in your eyes
Calm down
We all make mistakes
So what can you see through all the tears?
When all the fun’s gone
You’re left with the fear

What doesn’t kill you ….
Fill in the blanks
Sick & tired of all the quotes
Those smartie pants
Think they’ve figured out who’s me
I don’t assume to know you
& I advise you not to

Unicorns & Pegasus
Pots of gold at the end of the rainbow
Just don’t exist
Call me not romantic
But this is,  as real as it gets
I know you all just hate
The truth  said to your face

Down on your knees
Ruined in ways
Never thought possible
Alone in the dark
Challenging what you perceive
As the impossible